By Bruna Bianculli at InkDomus - São Paulo/Brazil
More you might like
tag your vibe
days of the week;
monday: snoozing your alarm clock, navy, seeing the moon in the morning, vanilla ice cream, writing poetry, blurry photographs, windswept hair, iced coffee
tuesday: seeing a cat on the street, a light rain shower, untied shoelaces, indistinct music from someone else’s earphones, empty coffee shops, denim jackets, long train rides
wednesday: pastel highlighters, drinking water, group laughter, plucking daisy petals, floral scents, counting down to a birthday, peonies
thursday: old books, a downpour, telling the truth, comfortable silence, hand holding, wrapping a gift, the smell of leather, reminiscence
friday: neon lights, sweet cravings, a little bit drunk, falling in love with a stranger, remembering your dreams, cherry red, late night showers, desserts at midnight
saturday: watering plants, childhood cartoons, a bowl of cereal, meeting someone new, waking up early and laying in bed, spontaneous plans, sitting on a rooftop
sunday: strawberry smoothies, golden hour, a soft feeling of wistfulness, lazy afternoons, 4pm naps, lofi mixes, deja vu, long daydreams, lighting sparklers
me, writing, throwing commas around like i’ve just won the lottery and i’m exulting in my winnings, needlessly, passionately, with no thought to the consequences,
hot take: ‘chivalry’ is fine as long as it’s adapted to 21st century values. if you are a male, you SHOULD be aware that your female friends face certain issues that you as a male dont. acting on that awareness in a way that keeps your female friends safe, isn’t a bad thing.
like… opening doors isn’t rly chivalrous when it’s just a thing you ought to do for everyone. but real 21st century chivalry might be, like, standing between your female friend and the guy that’s trying to get her drunk, or offering to walk her home when it’s late.
if the ‘chivalry’ inconveniences everyone involved and you’re just doing it for your over-inflated male ego — ie, “no you’re the girl here, you HAVE to let me hold this door for you and do all these things for you even when you can do it yourself and im just slowing you down” — then it’s just outdated misogyny.
Chivalry was literally designed to make nobles aware of their power and influence so they don’t unintentionally harm people when trying to do their job of leading and protecting people. Modern chivalry should carry on that sentiment of men and white people becoming aware of their own power of privilege and influence to help and protect the lives of their peers.
*Not to inflate their egos, but because it’s the good thing to do and makes the world a better place to be.
Chivalry, at its core, involves being helpful to people who don’t have your advantages.
It involved generosity and protecting those weaker than oneself: including opening doors when doors were made of badly fit heavy wood and often got stuck,and women, especially undernourished exhausted-from-childcare women, had a harder time opening them. It involved not lying, and following through on your promises. (A guy who is consistently late with the accounting reports, which delays the whole team, is not dedicated to chivalry, no matter how polite he is on a date.)
Chivalry is a code of ethics that involves dedicating one’s strength and skills in service to others; it’s not based on gender roles.
